The Kardashian Christmas card was revealed last night, and, wow, is there a lot of room for interpretation. (The other side, featuring Kim, Kylie, and Kendall, is here.)
As far as I can tell, it takes place in Kris Jenner’s fantasy dystopia, circa 2025. Everyone on the planet is dead, except for a select few Kardashians and their plastic surgeon. The plastic surgeon doubles as the family photographer. He’s probably Ryan Seacrest.
Bruce is chemically frozen in that glass tube over there. He can see everything that happens, but no one ever goes over to say hello. Scott, Kanye, and Lamar are dead. Rob is dead. North West is empress of the world, which is why she’s not in this photo. (Of course, empress of the world is largely a figurehead position, considering there are only eleven people left in existence.)
Mason is the only one who grasps how terrible this world is, but unfortunately he has been trapped in his toddler body and can’t do anything to stop Kris and North. (This is true in real life, as well as in Kris’s hellscape.)
This is what Christmas means to the Kardashians.